MISS MATURE

Dear Misty: I have a friend I have known for years! We used to go out clubbing & drinking a lot (think Sex and the City). Then she met "her dream man" and settled down. Well here we are a few years later & her dream guy became a nightmare. Now when we go out to the clubs she needs to party all night, which I am OK with from time to time, but she parties hard! And when we get together for lunch or shopping she brings her kids everywhere! Not that I dislike her kids but there are times a screaming child in a cafe is just too much! I want to still hang out but 2 kids are not part of that picture. And getting wasted is something I out grew. (Not too long ago) I have told her all this but she just doesn't get it. ~The Mature One

Dear Miss Mature,

Well first you will have to let your friend know that she will need to find a new getting wasted buddy. Be honest and let her know you have out grown this stage of life and its just not fun for you anymore. (This might not be too hard for her to grasp) She may just think the only thing you want to do is go out and get drunk because that is what you used to do. Either that or she is trying to cling to her youth before her kids and man etc. However it appears that have out grown your friend, and like in Sex and the City Times change and so do people. Being it is obvious you cherish your friendship with this gal otherwise it wouldn't bother you so much. So going forward you will need to create more of an adult relationship (which doesn't seem to be a problem for you.) Plan your future outings together either at home or at parks or places that are kid friendly. There is nothing wrong with hanging out with your girlfriend and catch up on all the gossip while the kids are running around Chucky Cheese. This way they will be busy and pre-occupied for a few hours and not in your hair. All the while not embarrassing you at a cafe where you have to keep reminding them to be quiet. That and when you get them home you can have more alone time for they will be tired. Where you can kick back and have a glass of wine. My point is yes you built your friendship on one thing but it is ok to evolve it into something new.

Good Luck with your friend ~Misty Eyez