How to be PERFECT (hostess)

Dear Misty,

I am a new drag queen. And I have been asked to hostess my best friends birthday party. He is turning 25 and its a big deal for him. He is going all out and its going to be huge. I know your all over doing a lot of parties and special events. What tips would you give me to be the perfect hostess for his special night. I have never done this before and Im nervous.. Please Help.

Nervous Hostess.

Dear Nervous,

This is something very near and dear to my heart and what a perfect way for me to break the Ice for the ASK Misty Section of the site... THANK YOU. I few quick things... FIRST Don't be nervous ... Dogs and bees are not the only ones that can smell fear (Shady queens are great at it) and Second remember this is his special day.. its an honor to be asked to help him... but don't take his spotlight either. However he can only entertain a few guests at a time so you will be perfect to help entertain the others.

I have devised a Top Ten List of how to be the PERFECT Hostess! This is applicable to birthday Parties, Hosting corporate parties to even Hosting Club nights. You want everyone to Remember you and of course you want to be a MUST HAVE Personality at their next party. (PS... also bring your business cards -- That way you can leave with another booking)

Top 10 things to remember, in order to be a PERFECT HOSTESS that everyone will remember, and want at their next party.

10. Wear Comfortable Clothes / Shoes. If you have a long train or a big ball gown your dress will be getting in the way of you and your guests. Hindering you of doing your job. Yes wear something FIERCE but comfortable and reasonable. Your shoes can be any style or any height, however if they are not comfortable you'll be tempted to sit the entire night and not mingle with the room. (Not to mention you'll be a total bitch if your uncomfortable.)

9. Don't be afraid to Introduce Strangers. You don't have to know people to introduce them to others, in fact this is a great way to learn their name and say hi yourself. Not to mention, if people can leave your party with new friends they are having a great time. If people have a good time they will come back.

8. Never argue with a drunk! This is a Lose/Lose Battle. A, you don't want to be seen arguing with them and B, you'll never win. Instead Humor the person as if you would a person that simply couldn't understand you. If this person is your friend bring up the topic the next day and then speak your mind.

7. Always look like your having a good time. Yes, misery loves company, but NOT at a party. If your having fun other's will want to be around you. In essence be the life of the party. (If your truly nervous, imagine everyone is naked.) Feel free to have a couple drinks to loosen up, BUT DO NOT get drunk, otherwise you will be memorable for all the wrong reasons.

6. Know where people are at all times. This does not mean keeping tabs of who is in the restroom, however it is keeping an eye on the flow of the room. Most people move in herds to the bar, to the buffet to the couches etc. When you notice a few people who are now alone or in a dwindling area go and appraise the situation. Maybe they left cause there is no more Vodka, so you will know to tell someone to get more. Whatever the reason is, you can address it or keep those lonely people company for a few moments, or at least until others come around.

5. Be Aware of your Eye Contact. Don't be constantly looking around when you are in conversation with someone. When someone is talking to you look straight at them, yes directly in their eyez. Use the time when you are speaking to let your eyez wander anywhere in the room they like, all while still seeming totally interested in what the other person is saying. That is once they start speaking again you resume your eye contact and your interest. If fail at the eye contact rule, you will not only come across as a disinterested bore, but as someone not worthy of trust , or someone very insecure. None of which are positive signs for a hostess.

4. Know When to Move. At every party you will have the guy that wants to talk your ear off, or you may be in a number of situations that make you uncomfortable. Once your inner panic sets in and you realize you have to get out. In this you can Lie if need to but do your best to not make the other person uncomfortable. Example: While nodding enthusiastically at whatever Mr Snore is saying, then but in... Oh No! If you'll excuse me, I really need to use the restroom. (hopefully you can come up with something else but that works if you cannot think on the spot. However if you use this one literally make your way to the restroom and at least check your face.)

3. Save the Embarrassment / Self Respect of others, Especially your VIPS. This is only for the advanced level hostess, for it takes a secure person to go that far for their guests. Lets pretend: A very influential person is a bit full and is talking to a group of people at a fine "white linen" reception and he/she spills their red wine clumsily and you are near by... quickly take your wine and oops spill it over top of their mess. "Goodness sakes, look at how clumsy We All are tonight." Have fun, and make sure everyone else is having fun, you will know when to use this, and it wont be for every person in the room. However when you do use this you will be someone's hero.

2. Say Hello to Everyone! Not at the same time of course, and if you have a mic that doesn't count. Make it your personal goal to have said hello or greeted every single person at the party. A friendly kiss on the cheek or a hand shake depending on how gay the party is or which part of the country you are from. This will leave the lasting impression on everyone, especially those whom you didn't know before the party. (This is a great way to get hired to host other parties) (BTW: Yes you are allowed to have your own guilty pleasure mingle with the hot guy or someone that you really want to get to know.)

1. HAVE FUN! Remember This is a Party. Yes you want to make sure everyone around is having fun, but never forget about number one: You. Yes eat drink and be merry, however know your limits. If you get too drunk you will not be asked to hostess another party. That being said also limit your time off the floor. Yes you may have to go change clothes or get ready for a number but don't be off the floor so long that people are looking for you.